30 March 2012

Don't let's be low down and dirty!

Recently, somone began to troll the fellow who preaches on the street in front of Old Navy, and this photo was posted on Facebook:



Now, while many people might be annoyed by him, I actually like Reverend Chambers and usually give him a quarter for one of his tracts whenever I pass by. His masterpiece is “The Truth About Homosexuality.” (Ask for it by name next time you see him!) Here's the very best passage from that informative brochure:

The Lord Jesus Christ has put it on my heart to tell you the truth about sex, according to the Holy Bible! The Bible teaches (in Deuteronomy chapter 22, verse five) that "woman shall not wear that with pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on put on a woman’s garment; for all that do so are abomination unto the Lord thy God." It is deceitful for a woman to wear or use that which pertaineth unto a man! In our day lesbians are using something that looks like a rubber penis, molded in the image of the penis of the man, and committing whoredom with it! This is just low down and dirty! The Bible says (in the letter of Paul to the Galatians chapter six, verse seven) "Make no mistake about it, no one makes a fool of God!”

Anyway — about a year ago, my son and I were riding our bicycles down State Street when we were stopped by the light in front of Old Navy. At that moment, Rev. Chambers was asking the crowd, “Is anybody saved? Is even one of you saved?”

Naturally, being a helpful sort of person, I shouted back, “I’m saved!”

“What are you saved from?” the good preacher replied.

I was about to answer something appropriate (e.g. the fires of Hell, eternal damnation, that worm that never dies …), when my son yells out, “Homosexuality!”

Chambers rejoiced at this, “Praise God!”

Ever since, whenever I ride by, he points me out and yells, “That man is saved!”

03 March 2012